How Al-Anon Works
Al-Anon’s program of recovery is based on the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous. The Steps are the foundation for personal recovery and the Traditions help groups sustain their unity and fellowship.
Twelve Steps
Study of these Steps is essential to progress in the Al-Anon program. The principles they embody are universal, applicable to everyone, whatever your personal creed. In Al-Anon, we strive for an ever-deeper understanding of these Steps, and pray for the wisdom to apply them to our lives. (Read the 12 Steps here)
Twelve Traditions
These guidelines are means of promoting harmony and growth in Al-Anon groups and in the worldwide fellowship of Al-Anon as a whole. Our group experience suggests that our unity depends upon our adherence to these Traditions. (Read the 12 Traditions here)
Twelve Concepts of Service
The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions are guides for personal growth and group unity. The Twelve Concepts are guides for service. They show how Twelve Step work can be done on a broad scale and how members of a World Service Office can relate to each other and to the groups, through a World Service Conference, to spread Al-Anon’s message worldwide. (Read the 12 Concepts of Service here)
Detachment
Alcoholism is a family disease. Living with the effects of someone else’s drinking is too devastating for most people to bear without help.
In Al-Anon we learn individuals are not responsible for another person’s disease or recovery from it.
We let go of our obsession with another’s behavior and begin to lead happier and more manageable lives, lives with dignity and rights; lives guided by a Power greater than ourselves.
In Al-Anon we learn:
Not to suffer because of the actions or reactions of other people;
Not to allow ourselves to be used or abused by others in the interest of another’s recovery;
Not to do for others what they could do for themselves;
Not to manipulate situations so others will eat, go to bed, get up, pay bills, not drink;
Not to cover up for anyone’s mistakes or misdeeds;
Not to create a crisis;
Not to prevent a crisis if it is in the natural course of events.
Detachment is neither kind nor unkind. It does not imply judgement or condemnation of the person or situation from which we are detaching. It is simply a means that allows us to separate ourselves from the adverse effects that another person’s alcoholism can have upon our lives.
Detachment helps families look at their situations realistically and objectively, thereby making intelligent decisions possible.